The Titans Go to Sydney
by koryandrs
Summary: A recent onslaught of crime has left all five of the Teen Titans exhausted, and Robin knows it. When Starfire proposes that the team take a well-deserved vacation, he all but begs to choose their destination. Where better to let himself and his friends relax than Sydney, Australia? *Takes place after the TTG! episode "Dude Relax".*


"Tell me," Robin growled, hoisting the ski mask-clad burglar up by his wooly black sweater, "what you know about Slade."

The burglar grinned at the Boy Wonder cheekily but his eyes were wont to display fear; and as protégé of the World's Greatest Detective, Dick knew that he wouldn't have to wait long to get results. Hopefully. He was _supposed_ to go out and visit a cooking convention with Starfire but he'd been distracted by Slade a burglar on the way Slade to meet her Slade _Slade SLADE HAD __**BEEN **__HERE-_

"You okay there, dude?"

Robin blinked at the sound of the burglar's voice, hardening his gaze upon him once he realized who had woken him from his drunken stupor. "Do I _look _okay?"

He had intended to come off as 100% serious but it was readily apparent that the burly man saw right past his façade. Now a lot less afraid of the Teen Titan, he responded, "Like a car rolling dirt on a broken pizza. You're in pristine condition."

"Am not," Robin mumbled offhandedly.

The burglar must have noticed him again. "Am too."

"Am _not_."

"Am _too_."

"Am _NOT!_"

"Am _TOO!_"

"_AM NOT!_"

"_AM- YOU GET THE POINT!_"

"Whatever you say then, pal," Robin sighed as he pulled out a pair of handcuffs, catching the burglar off guard. He left the criminal tied up by an especially busy park bench and strolled off, whistling hardily, to meet his friend who was a girl.

Gary Sue was confused. He'd meant to sneak into a jewelry store and snatch all the valuable collectibles he could find; unfortunately Robin, always thirsty for trouble, attacked him to get his need quenched. Gary had at first accepted this intrusion as being a normal part of any criminal's life, but as the fight went on he began to notice something…

_Off_. Unhinged. Like the Boy Wonder could blow a gasket and go bonkers at any given second. The part-time minion knew all too well that Batman and Robin were _not_ forces to be reckoned with, yeah, but Robin wasn't right at the moment… he was dangerous, a threat. And it had the Sue…

* * *

"… Worried. I am very concerned that friend Robin may not be in the healthiest of mental states, even as we speak. May I go look for him?"

"You could," Cyborg mused, robotic finger on his chin, "buuut…"

Starfire looked at her friend curiously. He grinned before continuing, "He's still Robin. He may be worked out of his mind, of course, but he can still be a hero if he wants to. Remember, Spike-"

"Although your reassurance is most useful, I still cannot help but think that Robin may-"

"Remember, Robin-" Cyborg paused a bit here, a bit irritated by Starfire's passionate interruption- "Robin's still devoted to us. He's our leader. Don't tell me y'all have forgotten the time he went and sold us all out to Slade?"

The other Titans paled.

"Oh yeah, don't remind me," Beast Boy said worriedly. "Dude, I was feeling the pain from those nanobots _hours_ after you managed to extract 'em all from my-"

Any further response that Garfield "I Hate Mondays" Logan was to have to this conversation would henceforth be slapped silly by Rachel Chyanne Diane Walker Prince-Roth, otherwise known as Raven.

"Have anything _meaningful _to contribute?" she rasped, glaring at the green boy. His eyes widened, head shook in quick defeat. Raven rolled her eyes and turned to face Cyborg and Starfire. "I assumed the lesson to be taken from that we'll always try to help an ally, even if they're being forced to do something against their will."

"That is what I presumed as well," Starfire chimed. "Yet I again do not understand. Friend Cyborg, are you implying that Robin may possibly be undergoing the…" she gasped; not a good sign, "_veshtak?_"

"Veshtak?"

Starfire looked at Beast Boy with a sad smile for a moment before sighing. "Veshtak. It is the process by which a Tamaranian, male or female, is overcome by fear and stress and find themselves being overtaken by inner darkness. They may be able to keep it below the rapping for a while…"

"Star," Cyborg interrupted, "I think you mean 'under wraps.'"

"Ah, yes!" She blushed profusely, giggling a bit before continuing. "They may be able to keep the darkness under wraps for a while, but unless it can be controlled it will continue to consume…" the alien princess began to shake, leading Beast Boy to put a comforting hand on her, "… and given our status as a very emotional race, it is not long before said hold vanishes and… and…"

"Something bad happens," Raven finished. "You… _might _wanna quit crying. Robin won't be too happy when he sees you acting like this."

The word "Robin" was clearly entrenched in Starfire's mind; _so _much so, in fact, that the alien princess quickly perked, wiping her tears on Raven's robe (leading to a masked expression of disgust from the sorceress.) She turned to her friends and looked at them with a hesitant glare.

"Is there anything we can do?" Beast Boy asked, ignoring the sting of Raven's slap.

"I do not… _believe_ so," Starfire responded. "Truly, I have never experienced the onset of the _veshtak _firsthand; it was only through the behavior of my sister upon her return that I realized such a thing could happen." She stewed over Beast Boy's inquiry in her mind, placing a hand over her cheek while doing so. "Perhaps we could remove friend Robin from the source of his troubles? He does not show it on the surface, but I know he yearns for some rest…"

The other Titans raised an eyebrow at this. How would Starfire, despite her yet-to-be-disputed status as the happiest girl in the world, be able to see through someone as emotionally blockaded as Robin? It seemed suspicious, and they knew it.

"… If it helps, he would consider it a courtesy," the Tamaranian finished softly, mildly blushing.

Cyborg shifted his eyes to Beast Boy and Raven for a moment, obviously trying to determine how truthful his friend was being, before nodding. "Then we're all in agreement? Robin isn't fighting for a week?"

"Make that two," Raven rasped.

"_Three!_" Beast Boy countered.

Silkie chirped at this.

Strangely enough, Starfire considered his noise as a challenge, for her eyes soon began to glow as she bellowed, "_FIVE!_"

Cyborg frowned. "_Five_? Star, I know you love and care for Robin deeply-" Starfire herself frowned now- "but we can't just remove the guy from the superhero business for more than a month!"

"Our friends are all in agreement," Starfire said. "It is what is best for him."

"Don't tell me you haven't been itchin' to get away and beat _Mega Monkeys 3D: Planet of the Orangulartans_ as much as I have, Cy."

"Oh… yeah, of _course_ I have! What am I, Starhard? No- I just figured that the city wouldn't be able to handle itself if Robin was away-"

"Jump is more than capable of protecting its borders now," Raven said. "It isn't as fragile as it once was." Cyborg again shifted his eyes- clearly the idea of the Boy Wonder not playing hero for a long period of time was bothering him- before he capitulated once more. And the Titans cheered.

"I_ thank _you, Cyborg!" Starfire squealed, flying up to her friend and giving him a bone-crushing hug. "This experience will surely benefit friend Robin for the better!"

"If by 'better' you mean 'reverting him back to a point that we should've surpassed ages ago'," Cyborg spat, remark muffled within the tangled web that was the princess's hair, "then yeah, I'm all for it."

"But where should we send him?" Beast Boy asked. "I mean, shouldn't we ask Robin what he wants to do? A part of me's thinking he wouldn't much like coming back to the Tower only to be told 'hey, you're stressed out of your freakin' mind, get out of here!"

"Send him out of the county, for one thing," Raven said, beginning to meditate. "Las Vegas, Texas, Gotham, Canada- all we're clear on is that he needs a break."

"A time to be away from the Titans for a while and work out his kinks."

Starfire smiled. "A holiday, then. He needs the vacation-"

"- A vacation."

"Friend Robin?"

An immensely disheveled Robin opened the doors to the Ops Centre as far back as they would go and hobbled inside, surprising the Titans with how… _dirty_ he looked.

"Yeah, Star. It's me." Robin raised a nonexistent eyebrow. "Where did you _go_? I said I would be back in your arms as soon as I could."

"Yet you did not show," Starfire pouted. "I decided it would not be worth it to wait for you to take down the Slade and- _induce the veshtak-_"

Robin paled. "Vesh… tak? What? What'd I do?"

The others simply stared at him. He sighed and walked over to his friend. "Starfire, please- why're you crying? It makes me anxious…"

"You need not be, friend," Starfire sobbed, talking to Robin in a lilted tone. "I am s-simply… _no_… worried…"

"Of what? Veshtak?" In trying to comfort Starfire, the Boy Wonder gave her a cheery smile. "Whatever it is, Star, don't worry. It won't harm me."

Starfire looked up at Robin, emerald eyes blurred by her tears. "T-truly you believe so?" He nodded. "Then gratify you I shall, friend!"

Whatever Robin was planning to say to this was squeezed out of him rapidly in one of the alien's signature hugs. All he _could_ say to this, judging by the way she was nuzzling his forehead, was a victim's signature response. "T-thanks a ton, Starfire, b-but I'm kinda… _choking!_"

"Oh!" Blushing beet red, Starfire quickly put Robin down. "My apologies, Robin. I was merely worried for your safety."

"As am I," Robin admitted truthfully. He turned to face the other Titans, straightening his posture and tone into what many had dubbed "leader mode". "Team, I don't know if you've noticed this in the past few weeks or so, but lately I've been feelin' kinda…"

"Stressed?"

"Burned out?" Beast Boy helpfully supplied.

"Ill?"

Robin laughed. "Maybe not to the extent that _you've_ put it, Raven, but yeah. I'm burned out. We all are. We need a break."

"What makes you reason that we ourselves are done burning, Robin?" Starfire asked, head cocked to the side in curiosity.

"Well… for starters, it took you guys _much _more time was needed to take down Control Freak…" The Titans all sighed, remembering the long slog they had taken in putting a stop to one of the pudgy nerd's stupid plans.

"… And it took _me_ much more _force_ than was needed to haul him in." Here Robin put a hand to his forehead, shaking a bit. Starfire sidled up to him and put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

Cyborg took a moment to take in the scene, but he soon nodded again. "So you're sayin' _we're_ overworking ourselves too?"

"In a word, yes."

The athlete hemmed in acknowledgement and moved to the kitchen to think things over. The witch continued to meditate, while the changeling decided to get his say in.

"What do you want us to do about it?" he asked.

"Like I said before," Robin answered. "We need a vacation."

"But where to? Europe? Asia? Y'know, I hear Cancun is pretty nice at this time of year," Beast Boy said, grinning madly.

"You only think that because of all the, and I quote, 'hot babes' that'll be sunbathing there," Cyborg mused.

"Oh _yeah_?" Beast Boy spat. "Then where do YOU have in mind?"

Cyborg frowned. "Not too many places, really. Florida, Egypt, Washington D.C…"

As Beast Boy harrumphed and sat down on the couch, Raven continued, "Andover, Bangkok, Paris…"

"I would very much like to visit the swamp moons of Denthrax Four," Starfire chimed, hands clasped together cheerfully. "This time… how do you say? 'For reality'."

"Is there anywhere _you_ want to go, Robin?"

The Titans all looked to Robin expectantly, hoping the Boy Wonder would go with one of their specific choices. He took a while to make a decision, evident in the way he looked down at the floor, ignoring Starfire's curious gaze. Finally, he lifted his head to the team, relishing in the positive aura their eager faces gave off, and cheekily smiled.

"Sydney."

Everyone paled.

"_**SYDNEY?**_"

Robin's smile grew even wider, magnifying Beast Boy and Raven's shock. He nodded. "Sydney."

The joy Robin radiated from the way the two "lovebirds" fainted all but convinced Starfire that the Boy Wonder was cured.

* * *

**Well then... for my first purely TT story, this can't have been what anyone was expecting. A comedy? Yes. A comedy in which the Titans go on vacation? Maybe. But a comedy in which the Titans go on vacation to Sydney, Australia? That's _way_ too specific to be predictable. And I realize that. Even I am not sure why I chose that setting in particular... well, I _did_ take a vacation there myself a long time ago (just after Season 4 had finished airing, natch.) That and the fact that TTG!'s got me into the mood of writing fanfics again.**

**By the way, the style and tone of that show will probably be a huge influence on this story, purely because I find it to be a perfect way of bringing the characters of the old show into a newer, more modern setting. So I _guess_ you can consider this the first TTG! fanfic (if those even exist, anyway... all I've seen here is revile and repulsion towards the damn thing.)**

**Expect a new chapter SOON... this is going to be a short little clip, as I don't really want to put too much plot into it. Doesn't need so much as is; I don't want to imagine an ending where Raven is battling the Brain on top of an immolating Harbour Bridge, or something like that. Things will be simple. I like simplistic stories.**

**(Veshtak was, obviously, a concept created by me, though I have a suspicion something like it was referred to in the comics or the original show or some place.)**


End file.
